How To Stop Change Stressing You Out

How To Stop Change Stressing You Out



One of​ the​ biggest triggers for an​ episode of​ stress,​ depression or​ anxiety is​ a​ change to​ our lives,​ particularly unwanted change such as​ a​ death of​ a​ loved one,​ a​ job loss or​ a​ relationship breakdown. These are unpleasant experiences and for many,​ a​ prolonged period of​ mental trauma followed.

During the​ past week,​ two friends of​ mine have experienced differing major changes to​ their lives yet both reacted in​ exactly the​ same way. There is​ a​ very important skill to​ be learned from both experiences when it​ comes to​ change,​ and I’ll share it​ with you. Before I do,​ let’s look at​ how two totally different changes can trigger the​ same reaction but with drastically different emotional results.

Jimmy was my best buddy during childhood and our families were good friends. I haven’t seen him for a​ while and out of​ the​ blue,​ I bumped into him whilst on​ a​ night out. Sadly,​ his news wasn’t good as​ his father had passed away after battling cancer that very morning. Obviously,​ he’d known for a​ while that his father’s days were numbered but despite this,​ he was still in​ a​ state of​ shock and of​ course,​ he was deeply saddened.

I wished that our greeting could’ve been in​ happier circumstances,​ but such is​ the​ tide of​ life.

The following day,​ Paul,​ my best friend,​ rang me and told me some very good news. After studying and working hard for the​ last two years,​ he had reached his goal: a​ fully qualified commercial airline pilot. Knowing how focused and dedicated he’s been I was absolutely delighted for him! of​ course,​ he was buzzing with excitement about the​ future that now awaits him.

OK,​ both of​ them supplied the​ same meaning to​ their circumstances by saying EXACTLY the​ same phrase:

“Things will never be the​ same again.”

Same phrase,​ but a​ world apart in​ meaning.

In the​ first situation,​ the​ loss of​ a​ loved one is​ an​ unwanted change,​ a​ change that cannot be prevented. in​ the​ second situation,​ the​ qualifications are a​ wanted,​ planned change,​ a​ change brought about by conscious choice to​ achieve a​ desired lifestyle.

However,​ there is​ a​ very important lesson you​ can learn from both that can help you​ deal with change,​ whether it’s a​ desired change like a​ change of​ job or​ an​ unwanted change like loss of​ a​ loved one.

Look at​ the​ phrase again. it​ describes not just individual experiences but the​ whole of​ life on​ planet earth. Because NOTHING in​ this life will stay the​ same. it​ just isn’t the​ nature of​ life. the​ very nature of​ life itself is​ a​ constant cycle of​ birth and death.

As a​ species,​ humanity has evolved throughout its history and will continue to​ do so. the​ way life is​ today is​ dramatically different than it​ was just 20 years ago. Technology,​ science,​ education,​ standards of​ living – you​ name it,​ it​ changes.

Look at​ your own life and you’ll see that change has been ever present. People,​ jobs,​ relationships,​ lifestyle – none of​ it​ has ever stayed the​ same. And imagine how boring life would be if​ everyday was exactly the​ same!

Reacting to​ change in​ a​ catastrophic or​ euphoric manner isn’t the​ way to​ deal with it. Far better – and far less emotionally arousing – is​ to​ accept that change is​ a​ constant of​ life whether we want change or​ not and that change will always happen. It’s how you​ adapt and assign meanings to​ change that counts.

Keep this in​ mind when change occurs and you​ won’t become emotionally traumatized. Change is​ a​ constant and indeed,​ things will never be the​ same again!




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