Strengthen Your Child's Self Esteem

Strengthen Your Child's Self Esteem



Most parents want their children to​ have a​ healthy sense of​ self-esteem and​ many believe that low self-esteem lies at​ the bottom of​ many of​ society's problems.

Even though self-esteem has been studied for​ decades, its precise nature and​ development is​ still subject to​ debate. However, child development experts generally agree that parents and​ other adults who are important to​ children play a​ major role in​ laying a​ solid foundation​ for​ a​ child's self esteem development.

When parents and​ teachers of​ young children talk about the need for​ good self-esteem, they usually mean that children should feel good about themselves. With young children, self-esteem refers to​ the extent to​ which they expect to​ be accepted and​ valued by the adults and​ peers who are important to​ them.

Self esteem is​ so important in​ young children because it​ is​ a​ self fulfilling prophecy. The more confident children feel about their social, physical and​ intellectual success then the more likely they will succeed. Conversely, the less confident children feel then the more likely they will fail.

Children with a​ healthy sense of​ self-esteem feel that the important adults in​ their lives accept and​ care about them. They feel that those adults would be upset if​ anything happened to​ them and​ would miss them if​ they were separated. Children with low self-esteem, on​ the other hand, feel that the important adults and​ peers in​ their lives do not accept or​ care about them very much.

During their early years, young children's self-esteem is​ based largely on​ their perceptions of​ how the important adults in​ their lives judge them. The foundations of​ self-esteem are laid early in​ life when infants develop attachments with the adults who are responsible for​ them. When adults readily respond to​ their cries and​ smiles, babies learn to​ feel loved and​ valued. Children come to​ feel loved and​ accepted by being loved and​ accepted by people they look up to. as​ young children learn to​ trust their parents and​ others who care for​ them to​ satisfy their basic needs, they gradually feel wanted, valued, and​ loved.

Self-esteem is​ also related to​ children's feelings of​ belonging to​ a​ group and​ being able to​ adequately function​ in​ their group. When toddlers become preschoolers, for​ example, they are expected to​ control their impulses and​ adopt the rules of​ the family and​ community in​ which they are growing. Successfully adjusting to​ these groups helps to​ strengthen feelings of​ belonging to​ them.

Young children are unlikely to​ have their self-esteem strengthened from excessive praise or​ flattery. on​ the contrary, it​ may raise some doubts in​ children; many children can see through flattery and​ may even dismiss an​ adult who heaps on​ praise as​ a​ poor source of​ support--one who is​ not very believable.

As they grow, children become increasingly sensitive to​ the evaluations of​ their peers. When children develop stronger ties with their peers in​ school or​ around the neighborhood, they may begin​ to​ evaluate themselves differently from the way they were taught at​ home. you​ can help your​ child by being clear about your​ own values and​ keeping the lines of​ communication​ open about experiences outside the home. you​ can also help by teaching your​ child to​ socialize well with other children and​ encouraging interaction​ with children with similar family values.

Children do not acquire self-esteem at​ once nor do they always feel good about themselves in​ every situation. a​ child may feel self-confident and​ accepted at​ home but not around the neighborhood or​ in​ a​ preschool class. Furthermore, as​ children interact with their peers or​ learn to​ function​ in​ school or​ some other place, they may feel accepted and​ liked one moment and​ feel different the next. you​ can help in​ these instances by reassuring your​ child that you​ support and​ accept him or​ her even when others do not.

Self-esteem is​ most likely to​ be fostered when children are esteemed by the adults who are important to​ them. to​ esteem children means to​ treat them respectfully, ask their views and​ opinions, take their views and​ opinions seriously, and​ give them meaningful and​ realistic feedback.

A child's sense of​ self-worth is​ more likely to​ deepen when adults respond to​ the child's interests and​ efforts with appreciation​ or​ interest rather than just praise. Respond positively by taking their interests seriously with appropriate encouragement, for​ example, reading a​ book about dinosaurs or​ studying worms in​ the garden.

Young children are more likely to​ benefit from tasks and​ activities that offer a​ real challenge than from those that are merely frivolous or​ fun. Young children can be given appropriate responsibilities and​ tasks that make them a​ part of​ the community or​ family.

you​ can help your​ child develop and​ maintain​ healthy self-esteem by helping him cope with defeat as​ well as​ success. in​ the moment of​ failure remind your​ child that you​ still love and​ support him. Later, when the initial emotional response has passed talk with your​ child about the situation. Sometimes, it​ is​ important to​ point out that most people are not good at​ everything they try. or​ perhaps there is​ a​ lesson​ to​ be learned from a​ mistake or​ lack of​ preparation. Teaching children to​ work past the small disappointments and​ troubles of​ childhood can help them handle the greater challenges life will throw in​ their path.

As a​ parent, you​ play a​ primary role in​ the development of​ your​ child's sense of​ self worth and​ that sense of​ self will play a​ crucial role in​ your​ child's future success. Showing your​ child that you​ value and​ care for​ her and​ helping her learn to​ value herself can go a​ long way to​ building that important sense of​ self esteem.




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