Self Love Positive Self Esteem

Self-esteem issues seems to​ be one of​ the strongest emotions that challenge many women today. it​ has become a​ woman's first worry when she awakens, and​ her last worry before she sleeps.

it​ is​ said that we are all born with a​ natural self-esteem, but through the worlds concerns about power and​ control, we have been trained to​ worry about what others think of​ us and​ how we can please them. We have forgotten how to​ love ourselves and​ treat ourselves with respect. We are taught that loving ourselves is​ selfish and​ will only make us appear conceited, which will turn people off. if​ we are not allowed to​ learn how to​ love ourselves, then how can we learn to​ allow others to​ love us? We cannot feel love and​ positive esteem for​ ourselves if​ we focus all of​ it​ on​ others first. if​ we do, we then run the risk of​ offering all of​ our inner feelings to​ someone and​ not getting anything in​ return. at​ this​ point we begin​ to​ feel resentment, cheated and​ even lower in​ our ability to​ ever love again.

People that have scars from resentment and​ abuse are the hardest people to​ love. They have the highest low self-esteem walls to​ climb. in​ short, they are unreachable. this​ is​ not a​ good thing at​ all.

When a​ person​ says in​ all honesty that they are suffering from a​ low self-esteem issue, I take that very seriously. this​ is​ a​ true cry for​ help. They are at​ the bottom of​ their pit and​ are asking for​ help to​ get out. They are at​ a​ point where they will expect you​ to​ love them and​ take care of​ them as​ they would themselves. in​ other words, we all know the worst thing a​ person​ can do is​ expect their partner to​ be a​ mind reader. Well, when a​ person​ is​ suffering from a​ low self-esteem, trust me, they do expect just that. They will expect for​ you​ to​ just know what they need. They only have faith in​ you. They have lost faith in​ themselves long ago and​ they have no recourse. this​ places a​ very huge burden on​ your​ shoulders as​ their partner. this​ is​ not a​ good thing!

No one will ever be able to​ feel what another person​ feels inside. No one will ever be able to​ love another as​ they can love themselves. No one can read our minds. No one can do for​ us, what needs to​ be done to​ make us feel inner peace. it​ is​ our responsibility to​ ourselves to​ love us first. you​ really must know who you​ are to​ start. to​ be able to​ fulfill your​ needs and​ desires and​ goals in​ life, you​ need to​ identify with your​ wants. you​ cannot do any of​ this​ if​ you​ do not focus on​ you. you​ need to​ be all about you​ for​ a​ time. No one can do this​ for​ you, so just do it!

this​ is​ called finding your​ space. your​ space is​ a​ very, very important place to​ just find yourself in​ peace with no distractions. Just you​ and​ your​ thoughts. Learning about your​ self-esteem also means that you​ must come to​ terms with this​ question, "How badly do you​ want to​ have a​ higher self-esteem" ? if​ you​ really want it, then you​ will find it. you​ have been trained to​ un-love yourself, so it​ is​ not impossible to​ retrain​ yourself to​ love you​ again. your​ environment is​ also important in​ helping you​ feel positive vibes. for​ you​ to​ truly accept yourself unconditionally, you​ must look beyond the simple quick fix motto's that are plaguing television​ and​ magazines, such as​ diets that will make you​ a​ better you, or​ take this​ pill and​ you​ will be a​ new you. Ugh, there are so many misconceptions out there. it​ seriously boils down to​ your​ mind and​ your​ heart. Love yourself as​ you​ want to​ be loved. Love yourself as​ you​ want to​ love someone! Just be you! That is​ a​ very good thing!

Remember, "HABITS"? Well that's exactly what you​ need to​ do. Create loving you​ habits and​ respecting you​ habits. Think of​ it​ as​ your​ very first self-esteem day. you​ wake up, you​ stretch and​ hug your​ partner or​ just yourself. Even hugging your​ pillow is​ a​ good hug. you​ have no memory of​ any other feelings. you​ love yourself. you​ have no other intention​ but to​ take care of​ you. you​ look in​ the mirror and​ stick your​ tongue out and​ roll your​ eyes inward and​ smile! Smile at​ you​ because you​ love who you​ are. Ti's a​ very good thing to​ be able to​ smile at​ you​ for​ no other reason​ than it​ is​ good to​ be you!

Please do not get me wrong here. Life will still challenge you​ with its ups and​ downs. you​ will still have to​ deal with all the negative things that your​ day will unravel. But the difference is, you​ will be doing it​ from clear, fresh, positive self-esteem eyes. Nothing will defeat you​ in​ the end. Oh, it​ may give you​ a​ run for​ your​ money, but you​ will override all of​ it​ with your​ smiles and​ love for​ yourself. Imagine the confidence that will shine inside of​ you. your​ reactions will be out of​ love and​ understanding. They will no longer be from resentment and​ hate. this​ is​ a​ good thing!

Remember also that anything worth having does not come easily. Once it​ has been attained or​ learned, it​ remains forever. this​ too is​ a​ good thing! Many women have experienced the highs and​ the lows of​ self-esteem, you​ are so not alone in​ this​ battle to​ find a​ better you!

To finally have the gift of​ self-esteem will not bring you​ happiness, that is​ something that comes after. But it​ will bring you​ a​ deep awareness of​ who you​ are. a​ new respect for​ you. a​ genuine love for​ yourself and​ the confidence to​ soar! Finding your​ self-esteem saves your​ world, not anyone else's. But it​ does give you​ the strength to​ help others to​ find theirs. So Ladies, please follow me into the world of​ a​ very high self-esteem.

Dorothy Lafrinere

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